{"id":1814,"date":"2011-11-19T05:50:50","date_gmt":"2011-11-19T13:50:50","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.cinemastance.com\/?p=1814"},"modified":"2011-11-19T05:50:50","modified_gmt":"2011-11-19T13:50:50","slug":"holiday-movies","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/cinemastance.com\/?p=1814","title":{"rendered":"‘s Eve: The Movie? Then why not Arbor Day: The Motion Picture?"},"content":{"rendered":"

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\nFrom the makers of \u201cValentine\u2019s Day\u201d comes the new romantic comedy \u201cNew Year\u2019s Eve\u201d. Read it aloud if you have to and allow it to sink in. Maybe say it to yourself in the mirror to really drive it home. It\u2019s happening. On December 9th we will be able to witness a film that features a group of attractive actors at various parties on New Year\u2019s Eve. Ashton Kutcher is in this one too. Exciting.<\/p>\n

There have been plenty of films in the past to borrow from our National celebratory days. \u201cHalloween\u201d,\u201d Groundhog\u2019s Day\u201d and \u201cIndependence Day\u201d have been covered. \u201cApril Fool\u2019s Day\u201d and \u201cMother\u2019s Day\u201d have been turned into low budget horror flicks while Eli Roth gave us a fantastic little fake trailer for \u201cThanksgiving\u201d that played in between the films of \u201cGrindhouse\u201d as few years back. Christmas has been more than exhausted. (\u201cChristmas Vacation,\u201d \u201cWhite Christmas.\u201d \u201cA Christmas Story\u201d etc.)
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\nIf New Year\u2019s Eve is on the list of good ideas for a feature-length film then it is safe to say that Hollywood will eventually turn EVERY Holiday into a trite and pappy flick. Nice. Can\u2019t wait.<\/p>\n

Here\u2019s a list of plausible pitches for pictures that pertain to this premise.<\/p>\n

Columbus Day<\/strong>: We go another way with this one and it isn\u2019t about Columbus at all. It\u2019s a horror film. No mail. No trash pick up. No federal employees?? What are we to do? Probably just get bitter because we have to work.<\/p>\n

Arbor Day<\/strong>: A movie about trees. The planting of trees. The cultivation of trees. We can get Terrence Malick to direct (\u201cThe Tree of Life,\u201d \u201cThe Thin Red Line\u201d) because he likes to film trees. All of his films have amazing tree footage. Maybe go \u201cno people\u201d on this one. All trees. I\u2019m sure Malick would be all for it.<\/p>\n

Veteran\u2019s Day: As long as Oliver Stone doesn\u2019t get his hands on this one, it\u2019ll be good.<\/p>\n

Chinese New Year<\/strong>: Same exact script as \u201cNew Year\u2019s Day\u201d but with an all-Chinese cast. I guess we can let Ashton be in it too. This is sort of \u201chis thing\u201d.<\/p>\n

Martin Luther King Day<\/strong>: I suggest Tyler Perry take this one. Solely because it would then be entitled: \u201cTyler Perry\u2019s Martin Luther King Day\u201d and that would be awesome.<\/p>\n

Memorial Day<\/strong>: As long as Oliver Stone doesn\u2019t get his hands on this one, it\u2019ll be good.
\n\"\"<\/a>
\nFlag Day<\/strong>: I think this is an obvious opportunity to make an \u201cIndependence Day” sequel. Has anyone ever figured out why they called this movie \u201cID4\u201d? That doesn\u2019t really make since. Anyway, I\u2019m sure we can get Roland Emmerich to direct this one if we promise him he can blow up the White House again. No aliens this time, giant moths. Because they eat fabric. Flag Day is on June 14th. Maybe we can call it \u201cFD14\u201d?<\/p>\n

You have any to add? Let me know\u2026<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

From the makers of \u201cValentine\u2019s Day\u201d comes the new romantic comedy \u201cNew Year\u2019s Eve\u201d. Read it aloud if you have to and allow it to sink in. Maybe say it to yourself in the mirror to really drive it home. It\u2019s happening. On December 9th we will be able to witness a film that features […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":1822,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[1890,9769,14764,15332,23450],"class_list":["post-1814","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-feature-articles","tag-ashton-kutcher","tag-independence-day-movie","tag-new-years-eve-movie","tag-oliver-stone","tag-tyler-perry"],"blocksy_meta":{"styles_descriptor":{"styles":{"desktop":"","tablet":"","mobile":""},"google_fonts":[],"version":8}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/cinemastance.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1814","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/cinemastance.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/cinemastance.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cinemastance.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cinemastance.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1814"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/cinemastance.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1814\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/cinemastance.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1814"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cinemastance.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1814"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cinemastance.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1814"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}